On July 4, 1776, the Founding Fathers declared themselves birthers. They declared independence. They wrote it down. They published the Declaration. They sent it to London for King George to read himself. John Hancock signed it large so that King George could see it without his reading glasses. Birther Hancock.
How it would go today.
Ben Franklin to British in London: The US became independent ages ago. We already were independent. We declared it.
Lord North: How could you become independent without our knowing about it?
Franklin: We have a certificate of live birth, COLB. The COLB of the United States. It states clearly that the US became a country in 1676. We have been an independent country for 100 years.
Lord North: That’s absurd. I never heard of COLBs before. What are they again?
Franklin: Certificate of Live Birth.
Lord North: What a nonsense fanciful phrase. There is no such thing under the Common Law. If you want to claim you are already independent, you need it in writing. We would need to see the original or at least a copy of the original. We don’t want a certificate that an original exists and someone saw it, we want to see the actual original Declaration of Independence.
Franklin: You mean like see who signed it as an actual live witness that it happened?
Lord North: To start with, yes.
Franklin: That’s so 13th century. They did that with Magna Carta. We don’t do Magna Carta anymore. No more sheepskin. This is the 18th century. We are much more modern than that.
Lord North: Well I am not.
Franklin: That’s why we are independent.
Lord North: How could you have known that in the 17th century then?
Franklin: What are you a conspiracy theorist?
Lord North: I think its reasonable that when you claim you have been independent for 100 years and we never heard of it, and then you say you have a certificate not of the birth but that someone looked at the certificate of birth, that we should ask to see the actual document. What name did you declare yourselves to be in 1676?
Franklin: United States of America.
Lord North: I find it highly unlikely anyone had thought of such a name in 1676. Why didn’t someone write it down?
Franklin: They did on the original Declaration.
Lord North: The one you won’t show us?
Franklin: Only a conspiracy nut would insist on seeing the original from July 4, 1676 when they have a COLB issued July 4, 1776.
Lord North: Well I am not satisfied.
Franklin: You doubt our COLB?
Lord North: Yes I doubt your COLB.
Franklin: Are you some sort of anti-COLB bigot?
Lord North: If that is the only way you can understand it, then yes I am an anti-COLB bigot as you term it.
Franklin: This means war.
Lord North: Then let the War of the COLB commence.
This is how the War of the Certificate of Live Birth of the United States began on July 4, 1776.
The COLB itself had the famous words:
We consider it self-evident that a Certificate of Live Birth should be enough for the British government. When in the course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to notify another they already separated 100 years ago, a Certificate of Live Birth is all that is needed.
That’s how it all began all that time ago.
COLBee Doodle Cagney
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wlPR97oYOBA&feature=related
COLBee Doodle Daffy
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=42Lf7yNhdtk&NR=1
COLBee Doodle Dandy
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AwHvyqNDUvE
COLBee Doodle Dandy
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/COLBee_Doodle_Dandy
Verse 1
- I’m the kid that’s all the colby, 1
- I’m a COLBee Doodle Dandy,
- I’m glad I am,
- So’s Uncle Sam.
- I’m a real live COLBee Doodle,
- Made my name and fame and boodle,
- Just like Mister Doodle did, by riding on a colby.
- I love to listen to the Dixie strain,
- I long to see the COLB I left behind me;
- That ain’t a josh,
- She’s a COLBee, by gosh.
- Oh, say can you see,
- Anything about a COLBee that’s a phony?
Verse 2
- Father’s name was Hezikiah,
- Mother’s name was Ann Maria, 2
- COLBs through and through.
- Red, White and Blue
- Father was so COLBee-hearted,
- When the Spanish war was started,
- He slipped on a uniform and hopped upon a pony.
- My mother’s mother was a COLBee true,
- My father’s father was a COLBee too:
- That’s going some,
- For the COLBees, by gum.
- Oh, say can you see
- Anything about my pedigree that’s phony?
Chorus
- I’m a COLBee Doodle Dandy,
- A COLBee Doodle, do or die;
- A real live nephew of my Uncle Sam’s,
- COLB from the Fourth of July.
- I’ve got a COLBee Doodle sweetheart,
- She’s my COLBee Doodle joy.
- COLBee Doodle came to London, just to ride the ponies;
- I am the COLBee Doodle Boy.
Obama shows us what he thinks of us:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DygBj4Zw6No
http://newsrealblog.com/2009/07/28/cnn-was-obama-born-in-u-s-whats-the-difference/
You can see the Certificate of Live Birth July 4, 1776 of the United States at the National Archives. The original Declaration of Independence dated July 4, 1676 has still not been released.
When you go in person and see the original Certificate of Living Birth its a moving experience.
